Strippers Guide to your Stag Party essentials
As the kids go back to school, the chances of you fellas attending a Stag Party in one of Ireland\’s finest stag party hubs are quite good. Naturally our Strippers will be happy as they will get the chance to perform their sexy shows, collect tips and party with you. A stag party in September is an opportunity for the fellas to meet and exchange their summer stories. Also you can moan about the ladies giving out to you about the garden that is in a state or the times that you ended up sleeping on the couch.
The weather is getting colder, the butter is starting to freeze and most of all the summer holidays are over. So here is the opportunity to have a smashing stag party with our Strippers and a sea of fine ales and spirits. But how well prepared are you?
Most of you are not the organised type. And that\’s normal. But if you could put a bit of thought on the Stag Party accessories that can enhance your Stag experience, then the memories will be worth the hangover. They will also be worth the silent treatment and the nagging ( in well placed intervals) form your better half.
So let\’s start from another point of view. What should you forget at home before you head out to a stag?
Forget your work phone
It might be that you are working for yourself. Or that your multinational has you on short leash and they expect you to answer your phone at any given time. Trust me. You don\’t want to have a chat with a client or your boss after 10 shots of jager. Or maybe you do.
Forget your credit cards
Stag parties tend to be expensive affairs. So taking your full selection of Visa, Mastercard and Amex is a very bad idea. Especially if you have a slight gambling problem and the lads have a casino on the To Do list.
Forget your Rolex
Actually forget any expensive jewelry. Just in case you pass out in laneway and wake up with some unsavory characters offering to help you. Also do not take expensive suits, shoes and clothes. Do take your wedding band though and then store it safely in your accommodation.
Male Grooming Kit
I mean, what are you going to do on a Stag Party. Trim your beard for 1h or tell your life story to the barman? A big bag of creams, lotions and other paraphernalia is just dead weight.
Forget your common sense at home
Generally speaking flush out your priorities, plans, and responsibilities. A Stag Party is the occasion that asks for you to be as irresponsible as possible.
5 Ways to Pack for a Stag
So there are a few ways to pack for a stag. We have narrowed them down to 5 Styles of packing that our Strippers have noticed around Ireland. As a matter of fact, our Strippers have recorded the most minimalist Stag ever. So let\’s start from his example
No bag. Semi-formal suit. Combe in the back pocket. Wad of cash in the socks. Hero. Literally this what you really need for a good Stag. All the rest are not really necessary. Oh…and the number for booking strippers.
The messy Stag
This is not how you pack for a stag. But if you are a messy stag, you will find in your overnight bag the following items:
5 pairs of jocks.
These will be handy as balaclavas when you decide to act the maggot at 3 in the morning.
11 pairs of socks. Also useful accessories for messing around.
2 pairs of makinis, Borat style. Say no more
1 Hawaiian shirt. Good idea in summer, but try and combine it with ….
A three piece suit you are meant to wear at the wedding
1 half eaten sandwich
1 Camera with no battery or charger
Loads of change….hopefully that\’s not the tip for our strippers.
Then he throws in his girlfriends thong by mistake just to make things super complicated on his return.
Note that in this messy bag there are no shirts, or the basic deodorant. If you want a messy Stag Party this is the recipe.
The organised Stag
Here we are talking about perfection. And more often than not we all need to take his example. So, here is the rundown.
Sports bag , medium size.
2 pairs of underwear, fake D&G just in case he gets laid.
2 pairs of socks
1 pair of smart shoes
A couple of funny T-Shirts. You have to have Stag Party T-shirts. They are a defo must have.
Can of Deodorant. Some simple perfume like CK1. No need for fancy stuff.
Camera, charger and batteries.
Light rain jacket and a hoodie.
Credit card cash, phone charger and extra battery.
Stag Party basics like nugget of vodka or whiskey for a nightcap with the lads. Paracetamol.
The Horny Stag Party lad
Oh well, you gotta have a dirty minded fella on a Stag. So his bag will be at least rucksack sized. And guess what you will find there.
2 blow up dolls. One to take out for a walk around town and one for personal use.
2 packs of condoms. This might be a bit excessive you might say, but in his mind there is an orgy happening and he needs to be well prepared.
Lube. Strawberry and chocolate flavours. These will be in his pockets and he will scare all the female population of the town by putting both lube tubes on the bar counter. Then he will ask the ladies which one do they prefer.
Vibrators. Expect the latest technology of perineum treatment.
Leopard skin speedos for that obligatory swim in the Atlantic or Irish see.
Tablet, because porn on a small screen just doesn\’t do it anymore. And 2 spare batteries.
A rabbit onesie and an inflatable pig. No Stag Party is complete without the onesies.
Obviously heavy perfume and a shaving machine to trim his bush just in case it grows into a jungle overnight.
If anyone in the stag party is need of Viagra (or Canesten) this young lad will have a carton ready to go.
The forever Drunk Stag Bag
In this Stag party luggage you will find booze. He is also known as the Stag party refueling station.
First and foremost, the traditional six pack which will finish really fast.
Then the magical trio of spirits. Rum, Vodka, Gin. At least a bottle of each.
Champagne for celebration. Crystal and Lambrini.
More cans from Lidl to keep the cost down.
Oh. Tequila. The rest of the contents of his bag are irrelevant. They are there mainly to stop the bottles banging against each other.
Our strippers recommend also the number of a local GP and a good solicitor to have at hand just in case. Enjoy your Stag party and don\’t do what Strippers do….which dancing sober with a load of lads.